How to Make Time to Play With Your Kids:
Do you play with your kids enough? If that question brings to the surface any feelings of anxiety-driven mom-guilt, please know that it’s okay. You’re not alone. We all want to make connecting with our kids a priority, but how often does playing with our children make it to the top of the daily list?
Today it seems like it’s more difficult than ever to make time for the important things. Between working to pay the bills, ensuring mouths are fed, trying to manage a clean house, scheduling and making it to doctors appointments, dentist appointments, swimming lessons, soccer lessons, gymnastics, grocery shopping, returning to the grocery store to grab what you forgot the first time, putting dinner on the table, drinking enough water (have the kids had enough water to drink today?), washing clothes, folding laundry, organizing the clothes the kids have grown out of, shopping for new kids clothes (but not clothes that are too expensive since they’ll grow out of them in a few months anyways), making sure the dog is fed, running to the pet store because the dog is out of food, grabbing an iced coffee on the way home because you forgot to feed yourself and that should suffice, bathing the kids, getting them to bed and if the day allows it possibly fitting in a shower for yourself, who has the time? (Did I just describe your average Tuesday? Because it surely was a bang-on description of mine.)
Anytime I feel like I need to add something to my list, incorporate something additional into my day, the first thing I think is ‘what won’t get done’. What am I taking away from my already overflowing plate? What will suffer if I don’t get around to it? Parents, I’m going to share with you a hard truth question: what is already suffering? The reality is, it might be your kids. Now, are they truly suffering? No. You are literally doing everything in your power to provide for them all that they need. Roofs over their heads, full bellies and a safe, happy home. But the richness you could be adding to their daily lives, just by getting into their world and giving them your one-on-one undivided attention is truly immeasurable. I’m not talking hours and hours either – 15 minutes of dedicated play-time to your child can make the world of a difference to them and their development.
“I’m exhausted”, “I’m at the end of my rope today”, I just don’t have the energy”, are things that not only do I hear often, I say them often. We all do. We’re all just doing our best, and it’s okay to feel all the feels. And what do we do when we’re feeling this way? The reality is, a lot of us hit a wall at some point during the day, and just need a mindless distraction. I’m the first to admit that I’ll reach for my phone. I’m not returning anyones text messages or DMs though, I’m sure they can wait another few days (unless I forget to reply altogether.) I could tell you to set an alarm for 15 minutes, put away your distractions, and get into their world, and maybe that would work for you. I prefer to set an alarm for my other tasks (you’d be amazing how much tidying you can get done before a 10-minute buzzer goes off). At the end of the day, it’s more about changing our mindsets than our minutes - connecting with your kids is mutually beneficial.
Connection with those we love produces the endorphins to make us happier -more enjoyable to be around – kind of people. Yet so many of us are passing on this by mindlessly scrolling through TikTok, even with all of the other tasks we have to check off our list– and before you know it, it’s been an hour while our kids are 3 quarters into watching Moana for the third time this week.
So perhaps, our kids don’t just need our connections, we need theirs. What did we do when we were younger and hit that wall – we literally had recess. We got to have fun, be silly, dance, laugh, connect and play. Play shouldn’t be the chore, it should be the reward – because as parents, we are doing everything we can. We deserve a little playtime too.
